For most infants, the bond with his or her mother begins while the infant is still in the womb.
Prenatal attachment theory emphasizes that a mother's relationship with her unborn child is extraordinarily powerful and important to her future role as a parent. In most cases, the prenatal attachment is obvious just by talking to the woman - her body language, actions and excitement about the baby in utero communicate she is already forming an incredible bond.
Immediately after birth, the infant is united with his mother outside the womb. When the infant cries, the mother responds with attention, comfort, feeding and changing. Immediately, the baby learns to trust and expect that his mother will meet all of his needs. Infant-mother attachment forms largely within the first six months of life. Research has shown us that children who are adopted after six months of age are less likely to develop secure attachments and are at higher risk for behavior problems later in life.
As the infant growns older he will begin to venture out on his own. Using his mother as a secure base, the child may crawl into another room or toward another child. However, when he is unsure or afraid, the infant will return to his mother, his safe haven, for comfort. No matter how far or how frequently the child ventures out, he will attempt to maintain a certain proximity to his mother. If this proximity is not maintained, the child will experience separation distress until he is reunited with his mother. Proximity maintenance is one of the most important characteristics of attachment, especially when considering the evolutionary advantages.
Mary Ainsworth's "Strange Situation" from the 1970's greatly expanded upon her own theory of attachment as briefly described above. Her research demonstrated profound effects of attachment on behavior. She theorized there are three major styles of attachment: secure attachment, ambivalent-insecure attachment, and avoidant-insecure attachment. Since the 1970's, ongoing research has continued to support Ainsworth's attachment theory. You may be wondering now, what are these styles of attachment and how do they affect my child's behavior?
Secure attachment can be seen when a child becomes moderately distressed by their parent's absence yet reassured upon their return. The child feels secure and trusts that his mother will return. When frightened, these children seek parental comfort and rely on them for support in meeting their needs. Securely attached children have higher self-esteem, develop strong relationships and the ability to self-disclose to others. These benefits last throughout the entire lifespan.
Ambivalent-Insecure Attachment can be seen when a child becomes very distressed by their parent's absence. These children are not secure nor trusting that their mother will return. She can be counted on for parental comfort or support in meeting needs. This is thought to affect 7-15% of children in the US.
Avoidant-Insecure Attachment can be seen when a child avoids parents or caregivers. He does not prefer the mother over a caregiver or stranger when offered a choice. Because this often results from abusive or neglectful parenting, the child internalizes the punishment he receives for relying on his parents and has learned to avoid seeking their help or support.
Attachment style can negatively impact future behavior. We see from research that children who do not form secure attachements are more frequently diagnosed with oppositional-defiant disorder, conduct disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder.
