Kegel Exercises Strengthen Pelvic Floor Muscles

Kegel exercises are very important for each woman to maintain strength of the pelvic floor which supports the uterus, bladder and bowel.
Here is an easy "how to""
***Find the right muscles. Insert a finger inside your vagina and try to squeeze the surrounding muscles. You should feel your vagina tighten and your pelvic floor move upward. Then relax your muscles and feel your pelvic floor return to the starting position. You can also try to stop the flow of urine when you urinate. If you succeed, you've got the basic move. Don't make a habit of starting and stopping your urine stream, though. Doing Kegel exercises with a full bladder or while emptying your bladder can actually weaken the muscles, as well as lead to incomplete emptying of the bladder — which increases the risk of a urinary tract infection.
***Perfect your technique. Once you've identified your pelvic floor muscles, empty your bladder and sit or lie down. Contract your pelvic floor muscles, hold the contraction for five seconds, then relax for five seconds. Try it four or five times in a row. Work up to keeping the muscles contracted for 10 seconds at a time, relaxing for 10 seconds between contractions.
***Maintain your focus. For best results, focus on tightening only your pelvic floor muscles. Be careful not to flex the muscles in your abdomen, thighs or buttocks. Avoid holding your breath. Instead, breathe freely during the exercises.
***Repeat three times a day. Aim for at least three sets of 10 repetitions a day. You might make a practice of fitting in a set every time you do a routine task, such as checking email, commuting to work, preparing meals or watching TV.
for original article and more reading click here: mayoclinic.com

Have a Happy, Successful Marriage before & after Baby...

Dr. John Gottman, leading marriage and parenting researcher, has conducted over 40 years of work with thousands of couples. His work on marital stability has revealed a short list that we can call the John Gottman's 6 Signs of Divorce.
Certainly, getting married and taking your relationship to a new level is sure to bring a more complex set of expectations for our partner and for ourselves. When horomonal changes test communication and anxieties about growing your family by introducing a new baby into the world, it may be helpful to keep in mind these 6 Signs of Divorce as a "Don't Do" guide. Most certainly, every marriage has ups and downs. So if you find yourself settling into bad relationship habits, you can feel confident in referring to this list to guide your behavior back to more positive interactions.
1) Startup - The way you START a conversation, is the way your conversation will most likely end. If you're trying to bring up a difficult subject for discussion, try starting it in a positive way rather than starting the conversation with a criticism or with a negative comment.
2) 4 C's - Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, Stonewalling. Usually, these 4 attitudes and behaviors will come hand in hand. But, even if you find yourself feeling or engaging in one of these behaviors, it may be a good idea to take some time and reevaluate the root of your feelings. (Criticism is attacking the person rather than the problem.) (Contempt is expressing disgust of the other person.) (Defensiveness is turning blame on the other person while shining light on yourself.) (Stonewalling is tuning the other person out and failing to acknowledge or respond to them.)
3) Flooding - If the relationship communication is no longer productive, one or more person may feel a flood of helpless helplessness due to feelings of negativity and inability to find solutions. This will never produce a happy marriage or promote your relationship.
4) Body Language - This is so important in maintaining intimacy in relationships. When your partner speaks to you, turn your body toward them! Look them in the eyes! When you use good body language by actually stopping your current activities to listen to your partner, the communication will feel and BE so much deeper than just communicating in passing. On the flip side, be sure to monitor these other, negative signs that your body language needs some improvement during an argument or discussion: increased heart rate, increased blood pressure, perspiration, secretion of adrenaline & the feeling of "fight or flight" (feelings that you have to argue or leave the conversation immediately with the inability to de-escalate the situation).
5) Failed Repair Attempts - When you and your partner repeatedly attempt to solve a particular problem and a solution is not reached, this sets a no-comprimise habit in the relationship that can be very dangerous to the marriage and very difficult to break. Be sure to avoid the "I'm always right" or "My way or the highway" types of feelings.
6) Bad Memories - Do you know couples that, when reflecting on their relationship, they can never remember when they were "happy and in love"? It's very important to create happy memories each and every day - go on vacations, take special times to talk on the phone on your lunch break, write love notes and do little things that show caring and love such as back rubs and breakfast in bed.

Food Safety & Vegetarian Alternatives during Pregnancy

If you're thinking of making changes to your diet during pregnancy, it's always important to discuss these changes with your ob/gyn. Here are a couple of articles for further reading on diet changes and making sure your diet is as safe as possible for the unborn baby. Food Safety article, click here. Vegetarian Alternatives article, click here.

Maternal Benefits of Breastfeeding - Lowered Blood Pressure & Stabilization of Blood Sugar

Breastfeeding has so many benefits for both the baby and for the mother. I found a wonderful article discussing new reserach findings related to the important benefits of mothers who were diagnosed as high risk due to preeclampsia or gestational diabetes during pregnancy. To read on, just click here.

Ed, Allergies, Acupuncture and Pregnancy

While doing some Sunday reading online, I came across this article written by Jeanne Faulkner, RN, on fitpregnancy.com. I thought it was so sweet! And it has some great recommendations for pregnant pet lovers with allergies. To read on, just click here.

Research on Breastfeeding

To read about the benefits of breastfeeding, take a look at the historical perspective on breastfeeding and check out cross cultural breastfeeding data, just click here.

the Beauty of Birth... Carter Zachary Byrd

We found out about 7 weeks prior to our baby’s due date that he was not in a good position for natural delivery. Exactly what we found out is that he was in the breech position and the umbilical cord was wrapped around his head at least 2 times and maybe 3. This came as quite a shock as it had been “the plan” to have everything be as natural and free of pain medication as possible as that was the delivery experience we were hoping for.
So, we switched gears, and prepared for a c-section delivery as that was determined to be safest for baby. We were asked to decide on the date, which felt very strange to me to determine what day your baby would be born on, and we chose February 15th. We felt strongly that it wasn’t really our style to purposely have a baby born on Valentine’s Day and that he should have a day for himself, unattached to any other holidays if possible.
The morning of the 15th arrived and we made our way into the hospital. Happiness, anxiety and anticipation mixed with fear are the emotions of that morning as we checking and I was prepared to go into the OR. Finally, they wheeled me off on my own into the OR, set the epidural and brought my husband back in. My doctor talked me through the process and then, he said, “We have a baby.” I waited for a few tumultuous seconds to hear him screaming and finally when I did it was the most precious sound I have ever heard, my baby boy crying. My husband and I both were able to hold him together at once and looking into his blue eyes I was so happy to see what I had been waiting on for 9 months. The love that built in my heart over those 9 months was so climactic at that moment when I first held, touched, looked at, and kissed on my baby. Carter Zachary Byrd was born on February 15, 2011, at 7:53 a.m. and weighed 7lbs 11oz.

An Exercise in Tummy Time

This week, I wrote some narratives for a couple who has a six month old baby. The parents wondered about the importance of tummy time. Because these are common questions - how much and how long should we do tummy time, HOW do we do tummy time - I thought I'd share with my readers.
First, it's important to understand that tummy time is a very important exercise for all babies. It provides for the baby a new outlook on the world (instead of being held or laying on their back). While the infant is stimulated by his new view from the tummy position, he will begin arching his back, moving his arms and legs in a new way, and also raising his head. Some babies will also attempt raising their chest above the ground with the use of their strong arms - but, this takes time to build up to and will only happen after your little one has had many previous tummy time sessions. Remember, this is hard work for ALL babies, especially  in the beginning.
Trying it out. When I introduce tummy time, I will sometimes lay in front of the baby so that our faces are in front of one another in order to encourage the little one to raise his head and look at me, smile and communicate. If it is a very young baby, he may not be able to raise his head much or at all, so laying next to him is a wonderful alternative. Laying together helps the infant feel secure because you are right there and within view. Once he feels comfortable, introduce an object that he likes and allow him to reach for it, grasp it, and bring it to his mouth. When I can tell he is very tired (after 5 or 10 minutes), I will softly massage my whole hand over his back and gently help him roll over onto his side. Laying on his side, the infant continues focusing on the object that is in his hand while gives the back and neck muscles some rest.
When you feel he is ready, try it again! Remember to always supervise the baby during tummy time until he is well able to roll around and has good control of his neck muscles. Several tummy time sessions per day will really help your baby ~ happy parenting everyone!

Personality: Nature vs Nurture

Social and personality development has always been of interest to me both as a manager of private Montessori schools and also having worked with hundreds of children over my career thus far. When prospective teachers would meet me for an interview, I thoughtfully considered whether they would fit into that particular school community. Likewise, when a families visited for a tour, I would meet their child and thoughtfully consider which classroom s/he should be placed based on age, developmental level, and of course personality. For the purpose of my blog, I thought sharing a portion of my afternoon reading on the debate of whether nature (biolical factors) or nurture (environmental factors) determines personality.
Truly, there is no clear black & white answer to this question. However, there's some new research that may shed light on this debate.... "Researchers in many different countries have studies thousands of sets of identical twins who were separated at birth and raised separately. If heredity played little or no part in determining personality, you would expect to find few similarities between the separated twins. But twins raised apart have much in common. For almost every behavioral trait, a significant part of the similarity between them turns out to be associated with genetic factors. One set of twins separated for 39 years and raised 45 miles apart were found to drive the same model and color car. They chain-smoked the same brand of cigarette, owned dogs with the same name, and regularly vacationed within three blocks of each other in a beach community 1,500 miles away. Researchers have found that genetics account for about 50 percent of the personality similarities between twins and more than 30 percent of the similarities in occupational and leisure interests. Interestingly.... the personalities of identical twins raised in different households are more similar to each other than to the personalities of siblings with whom the twins were raised."
For my readers who are expecting, it should be a delightful exercise to consider which parts of your baby's personality will come from you, and which will come from your partener. Happy parenting everyone! 

Water Safety

When I think about young children and water, I immediately get a little nervous. It's so important to be on guard and supervising children every second when water is involved. Because it's summertime, I thought I'd share a great water safety poster ~ just click here to take a look.

Hot Car Safety

Car safety is so very important, particularly in the summertime when the temperatures are high and rise even higher after turning off your car. I hope you have time to review this informative poster - just click here to take a look!

Sleep Safety for Baby ~ Helpful Hints

Always Give Babies Room to Breathe!

On average, almost 400 Texas babies die in their sleep each year - suddenly, unexpectedly, and without a clear explanation or due to accidental suffocation or strangulation. That's why it is so important to always give babies "Room to Breathe."

 

The ABC's of Infant sleep:

• A - Sleep alone
• B - On their backs with no blankets or bedding
• C - In a crib and cool (70 degrees)
• S - In a smoke free environment

Do:

• Do put babies to sleep alone on their backs in a crib or on another firm surface with a tight-fitting bottom sheet. If the baby leaves an impression on the mattress, the surface is too soft.
• Do keep babies away from second hand smoke.
• Do dress the baby, not the bed - dress the child lightly and control the room temperature. 70 degrees is ideal.
• Do breast feed and use pacifiers as both are associated with a lower risk of sudden death.

Don't:

• Don't put a baby to sleep with blankets, pillows, stuffed animals, or bumper pads inside the crib.
• Don't cover a baby's face or allow a baby to cover its face with anything.
• Don't let an infant sleep with older children.
• Don't ever sleep with an infant if you are drunk, under the influence of illegal drugs or medications that make you sleepy, or when extremely tired.
• Don't put a baby to sleep on or sleep with a baby on chairs, sofas, futons, beanbags, or cushions.
• Don't put babies to sleep on soft mattresses such as pillow-tops, waterbeds, or memory foam. If the baby leaves an impression in the mattress, it's too soft.
• Don't expose babies to secondhand smoke.

this article has been taken from the TX Dept. of Family & Protective Services Room to Breathe Campaign

A Biographical Sketch of an Infant

Although Charles Darwin's writings and ideas have proven controversial, I think it's an interesting topic to consider that he was just like everyone else in the sense that he was married, had a family, and found his baby to be the most magnificently interesting human in the world! Below you'll find Charles Darwin's observations of his own baby in an article titled: A Biographical Sketch of an Infant
"During the first seven days various reflex actions, namely sneezing, hiccuping, yawning , stretching and of course sucking and screaming were well performed by my infant. On the seventh day, I touched the naked sole of his foot with a bit of paper, and he jerked it away, curling at the same time his toes, like a much older child when tickled. The perfection of these reflex movements shows that the extreme imperfection of the voluntary ones is not due to the state of the muscles or of the coordinating centers, but to that of the seat of the will. At this time, though so early, it seemed clear to me that a warm soft hand applied to his face excited a wish to suck. This must be considered as a reflex or an instinctive action, for it is impossible to believe that experience and association with the touch of his mother's breast could so soon have come into play. during the first fortnight, he often started on hearing any sudden sound, and blinked his eyes.. At the age of 32 days, he perceived his mother's bosom when three or four inches from it, as was shown by the protrusion of his lips and his eyes becoming fixed; but I much doubt whether this had any connection with vision; he certainly had not touched the bosom. Whether he was guided through smell or the sensation of warmth or through association with the position in which he was held, I do not at all know.
Anger. it was difficult to decide at how early an age anger was felt; on his eighth day he frowned and wrinkled the skin round his eyes before a crying fit, but this may have been due to pain or distress, and not to anger. When about ten weeks old, he was given some rather cold milk and he kept a slight frown on his forehead all the time that he was sucking, so that he looked like a grown-up person made cross from being compelled to do something which he did not like. When nearly four months old, and perhaps much earlier, there could be no doubt, from the manner in which the blood rushed into his whole face and scalp, that he easily got into a violent passion...
Fear. This feeling probably is one of the earliest which is experienced by infants as shown by their starting at any sudden sound when only a few weeks old, followed by crying. [...When he was 4 1/2 months old] I one day made a loud snoring noise which I had never done before; he instantly looked grave and then burst out crying. Two or three days afterwards, I made through forgetfulness the same noise with the same result. May we not suspect that the vague but very real fears of children, which are quited independent of experience, are the inherited effects of real dangers and abject superstitions during ancient savage times?...
Pleasurable Sensations. It may be presumed that infants feel pleasure while sucking and the expression of their swimming eyes seems to show that this is the case. This infant smiled when 45 days, a second infant when 46 days; and these were true smiles, indicative of pleasure, for their eyes brightened and eyelids slightly closed. The smiles arose chiefly when looking at their mother, and were therefore probably of mental origin.
Affection. This probably arose very early in life, if we may judge by his smiling at those who had charge of him when under two months old; though I had no distinct evidence of is distinguishing and recognising anyone, until he was nearly four months old. When nearly five months old, he plainly showed his wish to go to his nurse. With respect to the allied feeling of sympathy, this was clearly shown at 6 months and 11 days by his melancholy face, with the corners of his mouth well depressed, when his nurse pretended to cry. Jealously was plainly exhibited when I fondled a large doll and when I weighed his infant sister, he being 152 1/2 months old.
Association of ideas, Reason, etc. When four and a half months old, he repeatedly smiled at my image and his own in a mirror, and no doubt mistook them for real objects; but he showed a sense in being evidently surprised at my voice coming from behind him. Like all infants he much enjoyed thus looking at himself, and in less than two months perfectly understood that it was an image; for if I made quite silently an odd grimace, he would suddenly turn round to look at me.... When five months old, associated ideas arising independently of any instruction became fixed in his mind; thus as soon as his hat and cloak were put on, he was very cross if he was not immediately taken out of doors...
Means of Communication. The noise of crying... is of course uttered in an instinctive manner, but serves to show that there is suffering. After some time the sound differs according to the cause, such as hunger or pain... when 46 days old, he first made little noises without any meaning to please himself, and these soon became varied. An incipient laugh was observed on the 113th day. when five and half months old, he uttered and articulated sound "da" but without any meaning attached to it. when a little over a year old, he used gestures to explain his wishes... At exactly the age of a year, he made the great step of inventing a word for food, namely, mum, but what led him to it I did not discover. Before he was a year old, he understood intonations and gestures, as well as several words and short sentences. He understood one word, namely, his nurse's name, exactly five months before he invented his first mum; and this is what might have been expected..."

Harvard Business Review on Montessori Education

This is a great article from the Harvard Business Review - Montessori Builds Innovators.
For those interested, I offer services on how to incorporate Montessori in the Home.

Benefits of Infant Massage

As a Certified Newborn Massage Instructor, I have seen the benefits of massaging infants and newborns first hand. When mother and baby have a strongly developed skinship through daily massages, the infant will not only enjoy special, relaxing one on one time with you, but a wealth of other experiences as well. For example, did you know that infant massage improves circulation throughout the infant's body? The improved circulation can speed the healing of birth related trauma. We know the birth experience is laborious for the mother, and quite similarly, the infant is working hard to emerge into a new world which required hard work for him as well. Another benefit of the daily massage is stimulation of the immune system. The calming effect elicited by the massage will allow for deeper more restful sleep for both the parent and baby - these calming effects help with babies who have colic and digestive problems as well! Stimulation of the nervous system is another very important benefit of infant massage. Stimulating the nervous system through the skin assists with the development of muscle tone, coordination and brain functioning. For all babies, eating is one of their biggest tasks. Newborn and infant massage helps the baby to intake and digest food more easily. Having stimulated all of her primary internal body systems, the body is able to use calories more efficiently allowing the baby to grow, grow, grow! Won't you join me for an infant massage class? On the right of my blog, you'll see a button to register online. I'm looking forward to providing a one-on-one newborn infant massage class for you and your partner.

Benefits of Yoga - for You and Your Child

Doing yoga with your toddler and older children has many benefits beyond the surface of simply filling time and space with your bodies. With the yoga poses I’ve described in my book "Yoga with Children" you’ll find the benefits encompass the physical, social developmental areas and promotes mental/psychological health. Let’s talk about these individual areas in more detail.

Physical Development –

Yoga moves help with the development of strength, flexibility, stamina, agility, balance and coordination. The child becomes more aware of his own body and enhances understanding of his own body’s movements.

As the child works to perfect his moves, blood is pumped throughout the body improving cardiovascular fitness. When done properly, yoga poses emphasize proper body alignment and the development of muscles that will aid in posture and body mechanics. This also helps the child to avoid injury during other activities.   Stimulating the body’s muscles and cardiovascular system also helps promote the immune system and neuromuscular development.

Social Development –

Doing yoga with your child enhances your relationship and the bond between the two of you. When children do yoga together, their cooperative skills are enhanced as they learn to share space. They may even impress one another with their ability to perfect a move or to interpret the pose in a new and interesting way. Yoga also promotes positive communication, both verbal and non-verbal. The skills of listening and observing are enhanced as well. When we do yoga, we often talk about peace. This fosters self-respect, respect for animals and the environment and also compassion.

Mental/Psychological Health -

Yoga is for all ages and for all levels of fitness. Beginning slow offers a positive approach toward exercise and health which results in stronger mental and physical health. Poses challenge the child in positive ways. The child builds focus, concentration, self-discipline and inner strength in his efforts to perfect the poses. Breath control is an integral part of yoga. Breath control helps when we are upset, mad, or stressed. Learning this as a child can be tremendously helpful to the child who is still learning to regulate his emotions. Discovering new poses will foster a creative imagination and allow the child to express himself more freely, nurturing his confidence and self-esteem. Actively doing yoga helps relieve stress and frustration and provide an outlet for social interaction  

Benefits for Parents

Of course, parents have benefits too! Including your child in yoga will allow you one more way to bond and spend time with your child. You’ll build even more confidence in your parenting! Teaching your child yoga will help you discover their learning styles as a little personality emerges. You’ll also find ways of calming and soothing your child as she shows preferences for breathing techniques and relaxing poses. Enjoying all of these benefits from yoga will reduce your stress, anxiety. You’ll be calmer, enjoy more relaxing time with family – and you’ll sleep better too!

Yoga with Toddlers (and other children)

Doing yoga with children is so much fun! It's especially wonderful because you're able to fit in some very important mommy time while you're teaching your child to move their body, stretch, relax and  focus on the moves you're doing. This month at HBMH, I had a delightful time preparing for the Parent Education Night: Yoga with Toddlers. While I was preparing, I had a great idea on how to share the moves with families who were unable to attend the education night. By clicking on this link you'll find a book in PDF format with the description of 17 fun and easy poses. This will be a fun project for your family - take a picture of you or your child doing the pose based on the description I've provided in the book. Then, paste the pictures on each respective page. You can have the book laminated at Kinkos, or you could put it in a 3-ring binder with page protectors. But, no matter what - your child will ABSOLUTELY LOVE looking at his or her own yoga book and repeating the poses over and over again. If you have questions or feedback, just give me a call or send over an email - I'd love to know how wonderfully it's implemented in your home!

Consciousness of the Fetus & the Neonate

The Association of Prenatal & Perinatal Psychology and Health (APPPAH) has advanced the research and awareness of the consciousness of the fetus and the neonate. They are most interested in how the fetus and the neonate view the world. From their research Wendy Anne McCarty, PhD, has evolved these seven principles based on APPPAH research and her clinical experience with babies:

1. We are sentient beings, conscious and aware from the beginning of life.
2. Our abilities to communicate and to be impacted by communication with us in the prenatal and perinatal time are greater than traditionally thought.
3. During our prenatal, birth and early infancy, we learn intensely and we are exquisitely sensitive to our environments and relationships. We form foundational blueprints for our life based on early experiences. This blueprint is the foundation for our growth physically, emotionally, mentally, relationally and spiritually.
4. Our early experiences become part of our implicit memories reflected in our subconscious and in our autonomic functioning. These impact us below the level of our conscious awareness and directly shape our perceptions and conceptions of reality.
5. Young babies already show us their established life patterns developed in-utero and during their births. The majority of babies born in the United States show signs of stress or traumatic imprinting.
6. Many of the needs we have considered essential for healthy development during infancy and childhood are needs we have from the beginning of life: to be wanted, welcomed, safe, nourished, seen, heard, included, and communicated with as the sentient beings we are.
7. Communicating with babies in the womb, during birth, during the newborn period and directly including them so they feel "we are doing this together", is one of the most powerful tools we have to help babies - especially when there are difficulties or medical interventions.

This article was written by Teresa Kirkpatrick Ramsey, BSN, LMT, CIMI

who referenced the following  material:
McCarty, W.A., (2004): "The call to reawaken and deepen our communication with babies: what babies are teaching us." International Doula, Vol.12, No.3, Sept., pp.8-13

Do you know someone "At Risk"?

During some reading time today, a question came to mind that just kept popping back up ... do you know someone "at risk". Thinking this through I considered how many women, children and families there are who have situations placing them at-risk, particularly in this poor economy. I thought I should put some of these scenarios out there, in hopes it will inspire at least one person to reach out to someone in need. 

At-Risk Situations for a Mother, Family or Newborn Baby Include:

* teen mother and teen father
* history of physical or sexual abuse

* poverty, poor prenatal care, poor nutrition, homelessness

* additions (past or present)

* mental illness or mental retardation (current or family history)

* preterm birth

* traumatic birth

* congenial problems or malformations

* genetic problems
* maternal depression postpartum
* lack of social support postpartum
* perfectionist and overly conscientious parents

For those families who have never had to deal with any of these circumstances, may you cherish your blessings and support others who may have to work through these difficult situations.

Prenatal & Postnatal Attachment, and Behavioral Outcomes

For most infants, the bond with his or her mother begins while the infant is still in the womb.  Prenatal attachment theory emphasizes that a mother's relationship with her unborn child is extraordinarily powerful and important to her future role as a parent. In most cases, the prenatal attachment is obvious just by talking to the woman - her body language, actions and excitement about the baby in utero communicate she is already forming an incredible bond.

Immediately after birth, the infant is united with his mother outside the womb. When the infant cries, the mother responds with attention, comfort, feeding and changing. Immediately, the baby learns to trust and expect that his mother will meet all of his needs. Infant-mother attachment forms largely within the first six months of life. Research has shown us that children who are adopted after six months of age are less likely to develop secure attachments and are at higher risk for behavior problems later in life.  

As the infant growns older he will begin to venture out on his own. Using his mother as a secure base, the child may crawl into another room or toward another child. However, when he is unsure or afraid, the infant will return to his mother, his safe haven, for comfort. No matter how far or how frequently the child ventures out, he will attempt to maintain a certain proximity to his mother. If this proximity is not maintained, the child will experience separation distress until he is reunited with his mother. Proximity maintenance is one of the most important characteristics of attachment, especially when considering the evolutionary advantages.

Mary Ainsworth's "Strange Situation" from the 1970's greatly expanded upon her own theory of attachment as briefly described above. Her research demonstrated profound effects of attachment on behavior. She theorized there are three major styles of attachment: secure attachment, ambivalent-insecure attachment, and avoidant-insecure attachment. Since the 1970's, ongoing research has continued to support Ainsworth's attachment theory. You may be wondering now, what are these styles of attachment and how do they affect my child's behavior?  

Secure attachment can be seen when a child becomes moderately distressed by their parent's absence yet reassured upon their return. The child feels secure and trusts that his mother will return. When frightened, these children seek parental comfort and rely on them for support in meeting their needs. Securely attached children have higher self-esteem, develop strong relationships and the ability to self-disclose to others. These benefits last throughout the entire lifespan.

Ambivalent-Insecure Attachment can be seen when a child becomes very distressed by their parent's absence. These children are not secure nor trusting that their mother will return. She can be counted on for parental comfort or support in meeting needs. This is thought to affect 7-15% of children in the US.

Avoidant-Insecure Attachment can be seen when a child avoids parents or caregivers. He does not prefer the mother over a caregiver or stranger when offered a choice. Because this often results from abusive or neglectful parenting, the child internalizes the punishment he receives for relying on his parents and has learned to avoid seeking their help or support.  

Attachment style can negatively impact future behavior. We see from research that children who do not form secure attachements are more frequently diagnosed with oppositional-defiant disorder, conduct disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder.

Montessori At-Home Activities

For some great Montessori At-Home Activities, check out my post on "Montessori in the Home"

a quote about Infant Massage

"We know now that infant massage helps growth and development. Babies who are massaged gain more weight, they sleep better, they are less irritable, they are more responsive, they have better interactions with their parents and they show superior mental and motor development."
-Tiffany Field, PhD.
Director, Touch Research Institute

SIDS & Helmets - a complicated issue

I've been reading a lot about this complicated issue and thought I'd share my findings...
In 1992, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) proclaimed that infants should be placed on their backs to sleep to prevent SIDS deaths. This inspired the state of Texas Minimum Standards for Licensed Childcare Facilities to require training in this for all employees. (This is why we only allow infants to sleep on their tummy after they've developed enough strength and coordination to roll from tummy to back.) Since 1992, SIDS deaths have been reduced by 40%!
Also, since 1992, there has been a major increase in a condition called plagiocephaly (some medical studies report the increase going from 1 to 400 babies.) Positional plagiocephaly is the most common type which literally means asymmetrically shaped head. However, there is another type called craniosynostosis which is the premature fusion of the cranial bones. For the rest of this post, I'll only be focusing on the positional plagiocephaly.

Infant brains grow phenomenally in the first six months after birth and the cranium expands to accommodate it. But because babies spend most of their time sleeping, the head of a baby who sleeps mostly on his back can develop a depression. Twins and multiples are more likely to get plagiocephaly because of constraint in the womb and prematurity requiring the infant to be on a ventilator, lying flat during the first days after birth.

There are some thing which can be done to prevent positional plagiocephaly.

Prevention Do's

• Increase supervised tummy time
• While the infant sleeps on his back, you could gently rotate his head to face the right or left
• While nursing, consider different angles that would be comfortable for you and your baby and also vary the infant's head position in your arms
• When changing the baby, try approaching him from different angles to vary his gaze on you
• Move mobiles around so the infant is turning his gaze in varying directions
• Move light sources occasionally

Prevention DON'TS

• Never poke, push or apply pressure on the infant's head, no matter where on the head but especially near the top
• Never prop the infant's head, the infant's body or his crib. Propping the infant or the crib is dangerous and should never be attempted no matter how small of an incline.

If the prevention strategies are not enough you will most likely notice asymmetry between 3-6 months. There is treatment which includes a specially fitted helmet prescribed for the infant to wear for about 23.5 hours per day for up to 6 months. This helmet is used to shape the infant's growing skull. How it works - the doctor will first measure and make a plastic mold of the infant's head. These will be used in creating the individual helmet. Once the helmet is ready, the idea is that it will fit firmly on pronounced areas while leaving room for the other areas to grow, letting them "catch up" to those that are more pronounced.

Correcting plagiocephaly vs. not correcting plagiocephaly

The research is more clinically based which relies on individual trial & error cases rather than an experimental and control group.

Pros 

• No research has shown harm from correction with a helmet
• Reduction in future emotional stress or self-consciousness
• The practice is not new as it can be seen in Asian & ancient Egyptian cultures.

Cons 

• Not always paid for by health insurance as it can be considered cosmetic (For example, Aetna pays for the treatment only in moderate to severe cases)
• The infant can get used to the helmet and when it's removed it takes some time for him/her to get used to life without it

I hope this information finds someone in need. I have a very sweet story of a little boy who did have the helmet and I observed him the first morning he got it off ~ the link is here.

A story about Baby Helmets

Cosmetic helmets are sometimes used to move & mold the infant's cranial plates before they harden into their permanent shape. I've posted more detailed information about the why's and how's of helmets which can be found here, but for this post - I just have a sweet story. :) So, I recently had an opportunity to observe an infant who had been wearing one of these helmets for a few months - and today he got it off! While I was observing this little boy in the infant community, it was so beautiful to watch the discovery of his actual head (instead of feeling the helmet). He was sitting up looking at a cloth book when he raised his arms and put them on his head (actually on the sides of his head as infant arms are shorter and don't reach the top). Puzzled for a moment, he paused then started rubbing just above his ears. He rubbed in a couple small circles and realized there was something fuzzy - his hair! He rubbed, twirled and gave it a little tug. But with no success of pulling it down to eye level and see what it was, he moved his hands around a little more and found his left ear! Again, his little fingers explored the ear... pushed it, bent it and then of course pulled on it. He didn't seem to mind he couldn't pull the ear down to eye level in order to see it though - he just looked up and gave a huge grin before going back to looking at his cloth book. Reflecting on this, I continue to be amazed at the joy of discovery babies feel each and every moment.

Language & Sensorial Development - Prenatal through the First Year

To my readers, I found this wonderful article discussing language & sensorial development. The perspective covers the prenatal aspect through the first year of an infant's life. It's about five pages long and I've included the link for you here (Languae & Sensorial Development - Prenatal through 1st Year).
Please do enjoy ~ happy pregnancy & happy parenting!

Montessori in the Home - Parent Ed Night

Montessori at Home - Picture Gallery
101 Things Parents Can Do... by Barbara Hacker
Montessori Applied at Home document

For those who were not able to attend my parent education night this week, I've made the documents available to you online. Just click the link above and you'll find a picture gallery and more. Happy Parenting!

a Beautiful Birth Story

I recently found this birth story online and had to share. What a beautiful story: Montessori and Birth

- Poem for Parents of Montessori Children -

 Today...

Today I did my math and science.
I toasted bread, halved and quartered, counted, measured, and used my eyes, ears and hands.
I added and subtracted on the way.
I used magnets, blocks and memory tray.
I learned about a rainbow and how to weigh.
So please don't say -

"ANYTHING IN YOUR BAG TODAY?"

You see, I'm sharing as I play, to learn to listen and speak clearly when I talk
to wait my turn and when inside to walk.
To put my words into a phrase, to find my name and write it down.
To do it with a smile and not to frown, to put my pasting brush away.
So please don't say -

"ANYTHING IN YOUR BAG TODAY?"

I learned about a snail and a worm.
Remembered how to take my turn.
Helped a friend when he was stuck.
Learned that water runs off a duck.
Looked at words from left to right.
Agreed to differ, not to fight.
So please don't say -

"DID YOU ONLY PLAY TODAY?"

Yes, I played the whole day through.
I played to learn the things I do,
I speak a problem, find a clue and work out for myself just what to do.
My teachers set the scene, and stay near-by to help me when I really try.
They are there to pose the problems, and to help me think.
I hope they will keep me floating and never let me sink. All of this is in my head and not in my bag.
It makes me sad to hear you say -

"HAVEN'T YOU DONE ANYTHING TODAY?"

When you attended your meeting today and do your work I will remember not to say to you -

"WHAT DID YOU DO?"

- author unknown

Busy, Busy Babies!

Nothing is better than taking a break from the computer and paperwork to spend time working with babies. In our infant room, our busy babies are cruising, crawling and rolling around. Yes, our not-yet-crawling babies learn to roll from one place to another in order to get a ball or other desireable object. A snapshot of the environment at first glance would reveal a 4 month old sucking on a sheer orange scarf for oral stimulation. Another, a 7 month old, is sitting upright working with an infant sized bead maze. Across the room, our 9 month old is moving through a short tunnel in the sensorial box. When he exits the tunnel, he can see himself in a side mirror that is strategically placed. He giggles before reaching up and pulls himself to his feet. After steadying himself, cruising is the next activity. I sit in the middle of the floor and wait to be seen, but of course these babies are so keen to their environment that every subtle move, sound or visitor is noticed. The 9 month old slowly lowers himself to thecrawling position and crawls right over to me with a big smile and a string of drool coming off of his bottom lip (another big task he's involved with is teething and the constant drooling that comes with it!).  The other infants are being cared for by the guides.. one diaper being changed, a bottle being fed, one being patted to sleep. Oh, after spending some time in this delightfully busy environment, I suppose it's time to retreat back to my office to finish up some paperwork for the day...

Stave off Pregnancy Nausea in the Heat of Summer

Click here for article & recipes from FitPregnancy.com

Belly Mapping

Belly mapping can be a fun activity to determine exactly where and how your baby is laying in your belly! Since babies move around and change positions, this can be done a few times in the last trimester of pregnancy. What you'll need: a sheet of paper, markers and a comfy place to lie down. Next, take the paper and draw a large circle with lines drawn crossways to make 4 pie pieces. Next, relax and feel your belly... do you feel feet kicking? Do you feel a big bulge on one side? Now here's the fun part - make notes on each section of the pie and then connect the "dots" to make a personalized belly map of your baby!

Free Parent Education Night - June 28th

Save the date ~ I will be conducting a FREE Parent Education Night on Tuesday, June 28th from 5-6:30. The topic will be about how to set up the home environment so that it's prepared for your child's ever-changing needs as s/he moves throughout the various stages of infancy and early childhood. Although it's free, an RSVP would be helpful. I'm looking forward to seeing lots of new & expectant parents there! For a map to the location, just click here website & map or click here mapquest map.

8 Tips for Birth Partners

Uncertain about your role as a birth partner? Follow these eight easy guidelines.
1. Support is a key element to a woman having a positive birth and postpartum experience. As a birth partner, identify the resources you have for informational, emotional and physical backup early on.
2. As you learn more about the process of birth, you will discover your strengths in offering support, and you can decide how you want to contribute to the birth of this child. Will you be the primary support, work more with the other team members or be by the mother’s side with your full love and support while others do the hands-on work? A birth partner can serve in any manner that helps the laboring woman, so be comfortable, even joyful, in whatever role you both agree upon.
3. Whether you decide to actively work with the mother or just shower her with love, simply being present makes a difference. The birth partner is usually the one member of the team who best knows her desires and can interpret her cues and express her wishes to others. Your personal history with the laboring woman is something the rest of the team doesn’t have.
4. In order to care for a mother in labor, you must also care for yourself. Eating and drinking during labor will give you the energy you need. Wear comfortable clothes and let the doula or nurse care for your partner while you take an occasional break.
5. Ask questions. Unless you are birthing at home, you are in an unfamiliar setting surrounded by unfamiliar people. A doula can help you get the attention of the health-care provider so that you are heard.
6. Be prepared to experience some strong emotions. Often, a birth partner is so absorbed in supporting the mother and remaining strong that he or she is surprised by the powerful feelings of love and awe that accompany seeing this incredible woman go through birth.
7. You and the mother may have the most familiar voices to the infant. When you talk to the baby, he experiences a feeling of calmness that has a positive effect on his transition to the outside world. Stroking him will also reduce stress hormones and improve his breathing and temperature regulation.
8. The postpartum period is a mix of joyous and difficult moments. The unpredictability of each day and getting to know your baby can sometimes make for a challenging situation.
Most importantly, after the excitement of birth dies down a bit, enjoy quiet time with the mother and baby, and delight in the miracle of birth and the part you played. This article reproduced from fitpregnancy.com (original article here)

Great Article - Abdominal Muscles in Pregnancy

Article link: Abdominal Muscles in Pregnancy 

Preparing Siblings for a New Baby

A new baby can be just as stressful for the baby's sibling as it is for his parents. Here are some helpful tips if you're preparing your soon-to-be big brother or big sister for a new baby. *Read books about babies and talk about what babies are like. *Get a baby doll and role play "how to take care of a baby". This will empower your older one and help him feel that his contributions to caring for the baby really matter. When the baby is at home, allow your older one to help as much as possible. *If there are space or other major changes (such as bedrooms) at home, be sure to make these changes as soon in the pregnancy in possible so your older one doesn't feel displaced when the baby arrives. *Spend time with friends who have babies so the older one learns what babies do, that they may cry a lot and that they need lots of attention. *Plan a special time each day to spend with your older child to have fun and talk. Having one-on-one time will really help your older one feel special as she discovers her new role in the family.

Birth Plans

Birth Plans are a wonderful and empowering tool that can assist with the planning of labor and birth. These are also a powerful tool for husbands, doctors, sisters and other supporters during your birth to know what they can do to help you at each phase of your labor, and to know your medical preferences.
Designing this scenario will bring a calm sense of confidence to you as the days count down to when you'll bring a new life into this world. Please call me so we can talk about designing a Birth Plan that's right for you.

Empathy in Infancy

A couple of weeks ago, I observed an incredible display of empathy in among a set of infant multiples. Since then, I find my mind wandering back to that moment when I watched with amazement..... An infant was working quietly on one side of the room. She had a material in her hand and was intently concentrating - turning it on one side and then the other; rubbing her hand against it to feel the texture and putting it in her mouth to explore it further. Her sister was on the other side of the room and all of a sudden became upset, wanting her teacher to pick her up. The first infant, who had been concentrating so intently, unconsciously processed the situation, put down her work and immediately crawled over to her sister. As she reached her sister, she stopped crawling and sat right next to her. That moment was amazing because the upset sibling stopped crying and they sat together, as if in unison, and waited for their teacher to pick up one. For those who doubt an infant's ability to show empathy and socialization, this scenario is a powerful example of just how perceptive these little ones can be...

Infant Oral Care

Infant oral care is very important to reduce germ and other build-up in your baby's mouth. The American Dental Association recommends parents begin regularly cleaning baby's mouth just a few days after birth with a small finger tool called a finger toothbrush or gum massager - an example can be found at http://sale.dentist.net/products/laclede-tiny-teeth-soft-finger-toothbrush-and-gum-massager. This massager can be gently rubbed across the infant's tongue and gums a couple of times per day.  In addition to providing oral health, infants love the sensorial stimulation provided from the brushing activity as little teeth may soon begin pushing to the surface! This also sets the stage for routine brushing later on.
So, when is the right time to take your baby to the dentist? The best time for an infant's first pediatric dentist appointment is as soon as their first tooth comes in. Some pediatric dentists will do free exams for children under one year old.

Free Infant Eye Exams

InfantSEE is a program in which optometrists will provide a one-time, comprehensive eye assessment to infants in their first year of life, offering early detection of potential eye and vision problems at no cost regardless of income. http://www.infantsee.org/

The family as a unit

In years passed I found at Parent Education Nights, there were usually a few fathers and a considerably larger number of mothers in attendance. More recently, however, I've been delighted to observe a trend where Parent Education events bring a more evenly distributed group - mothers and fathers are beginning to attend together, perhaps sharing the parenting role more equally. As a Childbirth Educator and Family Coach, the inclusion of mothers, fathers and children together is a primary focus for me. Rather than considering the child's development independent from the family, I like to consider the child a part of the family unit. I feel this perspective allows for a greater appreciation of each member's unique contributions, their value in the family unit, and the beautiful dynamic only they could bring to the home.

Infant Sign Language

Infants entering our world are equipped with communication tools (such as crying or cooing & reaching) that allow them to communicate messages such as "I'm hungry" or "I want to be held". Before we know it our little one is beginning to increase in mobility. Facial expressions begin to diversify and we begin to understand them in more and more ways each day. One way for us to challenge their motor skills and their communication skills is to teach baby sign language. When beginning using sign language, consider the infant's ability to reproduce the sign and the frequency with which they'll have the opportunity to practice. For example, "more" may be a good one to start with... the child brings all ten fingers together in the front of the body and touches them together a couple of times to signal "more".  At Healthy Beginnings Montessori House, classroom guides refer to a Sign with your Baby chart which can be found online for under $10.

Sharing my philosophy as a childbirth educator...

The birth of a baby represents, as well, the birth of a family. The woman giving birth and the persons significant and close to her are forming a new relationship, with new responsibilities to each other, to the baby, and to society as a whole. Family-centered reproductive care may be defined as care which recognizes the importance of these new relationships and responsibilities, and which has as its goal the best possible health outcome for all members of the family, both as individuals and as a group. Family-centered care consists of an attitude rather than a protocol. It recognizes a vital life event rather than a medical procedure. It appreciates the importance of that event to the woman and to the persons who are important to her. It respects the woman’s individuality and her sense of autonomy. It realizes that the decisions she may make are based on many influences of which the expertise of the professionals is only one. It requires that all relevant information be made available to the woman to help her achieve her own goals and that she be guided but not directed by the professionals she has chosen to share the responsibility for her care.
-In accordance with the International Childbirth Education Association, http://www.icea.org/

Prenatal & Postpartum Fitness by design

There are so many wonderful benefits of being fit and exercising regularly during your pregnancy! These research based benefits include easier, shorter labors and healthier babies due to increased oxygen and nutrition during their nine month gestation period.
Designing an individual fitness and exercise program, I take into consideration the overall history of health, current pregnancy health and the health of any prior pregnancies. I also consider whether or not the mother has been exercising regularly up to the pregnancy and we discuss her current fitness level.
Keeping these important factors in mind, we'll together assess fitness goals such as maintaining cardiovascular health, improving muscle tone, and returning to prepregnancy weight after giving birth. After the fitness program has been designed the mother will enjoy the benefit of guided exercise as well as my continued support, frequent reevaluation of fitness goals and the addition of new exercises as her abilities change through late pregnancy and after giving birth.

Interested? Here's how it works...

My Childbirth Education offers a range of services that can be tailored specifically to your needs and the needs of your family. If you’re still deciding how an individual Family Coach might be right for you, please call or email! We’ll set up a complimentary consultation where you’ll have an opportunity to review the full services framework. From there, you can pick and choose which areas you’d like to explore further and which areas you already feel confident and knowledgeable. Have you recently found out you’re pregnant?  Are you considering a fitness program during pregnancy? Is your due date just around the corner? Or are you seeking early childhood support? If so, My Childbirth Education offers services that fit your needs. I’m looking forward to meeting with you soon!

Welcome!

Welcome to my new blog!